Sydney chiropractor Hance Limboro fined $27,500 for cancer cure advertisements

Chiropractor Hance Limboro has been fined for false or misleading advertising, which claimed chiropractic treatment could cure cancer. Photo: Facebook The offender said it was ”a biological imperative for the male species to be attracted to a younger, younger mate”.
南京夜网

The online advertisement proclaimed: “By having a regular visit to a chiropractor, people can rest assured that they are prevented from having cancer.”

Sydney chiropractor Hance Limboro​ is the first person in the country to be prosecuted by the Australian Health Practitioner Regulation Agency for misleading advertising, relating to a series of ads on a website called Cancer Cure Sydney.

Included in the lengthy advertisements – which linked to the website for his CBD clinic – were claims that spinal adjustments could cure cancer because posture issues are “believed to be the root problem of all diseases and disorders, including cancer”.

One article also said chiropractic treatment was “worth a try” to treat brain tumours.

In Downing Centre Local Court on Wednesday, magistrate Alison Viney​ convicted Limboro of 11 counts of advertising a health service in a false or misleading way and fined him $27,500.

Ms Viney said while most healthy people would quickly disregard the claims on the website, cancer sufferers might not.

“Unfortunately the target of these sites are people who have chronic or devastating diseases, which make them so vulnerable … in regards to a cure or a fix,” Ms Viney said.

“Random people, healthy people don’t access sites for cancer cures.”

According to documents before the court, one of the articles posted in 2015 said: “If you are afraid to have the side effects of radiation therapy, one cure you can try is chiropractic treatment.”

Another ad said: “A natural cancer cure that most people choose nowadays is chiropractic treatment as it has no significant side effects and guarantees long-term relief.”

A statement of facts said the assertions were false.

“There’s no scientific evidence that chiropractic adjustment aids in the treatment of cancer.”

The barrister acting for the regulatory body, Duncan Berents​, said the use of misleading advertisements was serious.

“The articles themselves are promoting something that is safe and risk-free and something that’s a cure for cancer. This is potentially tragic,” Mr Berents​ said.

But Limboro argued he had hired a search engine optimisation company to increase traffic to the website for his clinic, Action Health Centre, and was unaware of the content of the ads on the Cancer Cure Sydney site.

He said he was “ashamed and embarrassed”.

Magistrate Viney rejected the suggestion that Limboro was not personally responsible, noting the website was registered under his wife’s name.

Limboro, 45, was also fined $2000 for using testimonials – which are banned in health advertising – on the website for his clinic.

One of the testimonials said: “Would have been in a wheelchair.”

Another testimonial said: “Since receiving chiropractic care, I’ve had no asthma, no hay fever, and no back pain.”

The court heard Limboro is likely to face professional disciplinary action.

Former Reserve Bank chief Glenn Stevens advises NSW on housing affordability

Glenn Stevens says housing affordability is a “growing challenge for many residents of NSW”. Photo: Louie DouvisFormer Reserve Bank of Australia governor Glenn Stevens will advise the NSW government on measures to improve housing affordability that are expected to be unveiled during or before the next budget.
南京夜网

Premier Gladys Berejiklian announced on Wednesday that a cross-government working group had been established “to explore all options to make housing more affordable for NSW residents”.

Housing affordability was one of three priorities announced by Ms Berejiklian upon becoming Premier in January.

She said Mr Stevens accepted a “personal invitation” to review and advise “on the options being considered by the government to tackle housing affordability issues in the state, and in Sydney in particular”.

A spokeswoman said Mr Stevens would not be a member of the working group – which includes senior officials from the Department of Premier and Cabinet, Treasury and Planning – or provide formal recommendations.

But she said he would be free to raise issues he felt were being overlooked or were otherwise important.

The working group is expected to deliver recommendations to the government in time for Treasurer Dominic Perrottet’s first budget, which is likely to be in June.

Mr Stevens, who retired as RBA governor in 2016, said housing affordability “is a growing challenge for many residents of NSW and I look forward to working with the government on measures that might help address it”.

“I am pleased that the government has indicated it has an open mind when it comes to reviewing existing and new avenues of dealing with the issue,” he said.

Ms Berejiklian and Mr Perrottet have not indicated what type of policy changes are under consideration – such as stamp duty changes – but have said boosting housing supply is the biggest “lever” for the NSW government.

Also on Wednesday, Planning Minister Anthony Roberts said housing completions in NSW reached the highest level since 1972.

Mr Roberts said more than 33,000 homes were built in the year to November 2016.

“NSW is experiencing a boom in housing construction like we’ve never seen before, with record housing approvals and completions an important ingredient in our quest to make housing affordable,” he said.

Dan Miller relied on pact to his wife to survive while trapped under excavator in dam near Port Stephens

Firefighters work to free Dan Miller from the dam at his property in Charlotte Bay. Photo: Facebook/Saimaa Miller The moment Dan Miller was pulled from the dam.
南京夜网

Dan and Saimaa Miller at their home in Charlotte Bay. Photo: Scott Calvin

When Dan Miller found himself trapped under an excavator in a dam, it was a pact he had made to his wife years earlier that made him fight for hours to keep his mouth and nose above water.

The 44-year-old builder was working on his property at Charlotte Bay, north of Port Stephens, last Tuesday, when the excavator he was driving began to slide. Before he knew it, it was heading for the water.

“I hit the water and was still on the machine but trying to get off. I pushed off and was underwater and I felt the roll bar come down just below by shoulder blades. I was completely submerged and I thought ‘shit, this is heavy’.”

Face down, Mr Miller slid up until the roll bar reached the small of his back in a position similar to a Cobra pose in yoga. He put his hands in the mud and tilted his head back to keep it clear from the water.

“That first, gasping breath is my clearest memory.”

Within 10 minutes the excavator had turned off, it was silent apart from the machine ticking away.

“I thought there’s no one coming for a long, long time. I stopped yelling almost straight away, it was pretty pointless, you’ve got to keep calm, there’s no point.

“I’ve done a lot of surfing, and when you’re in the water, no matter what happens you stay calm, you make good decisions. You panic you’re going to be swallowing water, diesel and hydraulic fluid you won’t last.”

When he tried to dig himself out he sunk further into the murky water. Water got into his ears, only his nose was above the waterline.

Mr Miller began playing through scenarios in his mind of what would happen if he succombed, realising it would most likely be his four-year-old daughter and her minder who would find him.

“They would bring her home and see the excavator in the dam.

“That gave me strength. I just thought ‘You can’t do that to a four-year-old, or my son,’ and I thought of the promise I made to my wife.

“Saimaa’s mother died when she was really young. When we got married we made a pact.

“It was humorous in that it was a horrible topic, but she made me promise I wouldn’t die first. When I hit the water that was the first thought in my mind.”

Mr Miller was stuck in the dam for five hours – he was rescued when a neighbour heard his well-timed cries for help.

“At three [I knew] my neighbour Mel would be home – I needed to give 10 minutes of energy. It was extreme and excruciating and I pushed my body up and didn’t worry about the pain in my back. I just yelled and yelled and yelled. I had to go down and suck in breaths through my nose and just keep yelling ‘help, help, help’.”

When his neighbour’s car came up the driveway, he gave it “one last burst” and was finally discovered.

“She was amazing, she just got on the phone and just bang, bang, bang. Then came more neighbours, then police, then the fire brigade – legends who saved me.”

Mr Miller’s wife, Saimaa, only found out about the ordeal when she finished work at her day spa in North Bondi and saw two missed calls from her neighbours.

​”Funnily enough I had the exact same thought that he did, he couldn’t die, because he promised me. Then [my neighbour said] ‘I can just see his head’.” ​

Great Lakes Advocate

HistoryStory behind Christo RdMike Scanlon

Then and now: John Shoebridge at Murdering Gully with a picture of what the copper smelter there once looked like.DOWN most streets, there’s a hidden story.
南京夜网

Or perhaps, should I say, behind most street signs lurks a tale. It may be a forgotten story, but an interesting one.

Today’s tale is about the likely unknown background behind the naming of a familiar street running today through Georgetown, Waratah and Waratah West.

It all started with an email to Weekender about the history of Christo Road, Waratah which went like this: “Hi Mike, my name is Greg Archbold and I’m a regular reader of your local history column. In researching my family history, I came across information that may be of interest to you and the readers of your column.

“It relates to John Penrose Christoe, whom I believe Christo Road, in Waratah, is named after,” he wrote.

“I feel this may be of interest to your readers because it relates to Newcastle’s industrial heritage. He arrived in Newcastle about 1869 to establish a smelting works at New Lambton where I believe (the old) Goninans is now located.He also managed the (smelter) works at Burwood Beach, on the southern side of Merewether hill.”

So far, so good. A little sleuthing soon discovered there was once a now forgotten New Lambton Smelting Works still employing a large number of men in 1880-81.

A quick check of council records then confirmed the Waratah street was named after a J.M.Christoe, a “prominent resident in the area about 1870”.

“But that’s a mistake, that initial M, rather than a P, ” Greg Archbold later told me. “I believe it’s definitely the same J.P. Christoe. Names were also often shortened when being written down.”

More surprising is that Greg Archbold’s recent research into the past is not because he’s a relative.

“I’m not related to Christoe. I was instead researching my own relative Thomas Hussey, whose name is like the Australian cricketer, when I came across Christoe’s name. I believe they were associates. Hussey then died in 1874 after he fell from a horse.”

Pioneer industrialist Christoe later moved to Queensland where he died in Mackay in 1918 aged 88 years.Christoe had originally been a Welsh copper smelter and assayer born in 1830 in either Truro, Cornwell, or Swansea, in South Wales.

He arrived in the Kapunda copper mines in South Australia about 1850 where he married Dorothea Blood, the daughter of a local doctor in 1852.

They then returned to Wales where he gained further experience in the smelting of copper which was vital to make wire, to have the then telegraph system operating.

They then came back to Australia in July 1858. Here, John Christoe set up copper smelting works in NSW at Byng and Cadia in western NSW, before arriving in Newcastle about 1869.

Christoe had left inland NSW in 1866 to become a smelter manager in Queensland. Soon after, in late 1867, copper prices fell and the miners started to leave Cadia despite having producing 2000 tons of copper.

The mine was put up for auction in January 1868, and here’s where this background story gets a little more interesting. The old Cadia mine site is today 25 kilometres south of Orange, in western NSW. It’s a series of large underground and open-cut gold and copper mines in the Cadia Valley, operated by Newcrest Mining Ltd.

And on the company’s online historical timeline, Welsh smeltermanJohn Penrose Christoe features strongly in the pioneering years of 1859-61. For it seems the secrets of smelting were very closely-guarded.

The Welsh had developed the tightly held expertise in smelting in England from the 1850s onwards. Meanwhile, the Cornish tried to circumvent the high costs charged by the Welsh and gain the almost magical knowledge for themselves.

And it appears Christoe may have left another NSW legacy behind. It’s the striking Cadia engine house and tall chimney that are now listed on the NSW State Heritage Register.

The unique Cornish-style engine house, built in 1865, is the only such engine house in NSW. Newcrest Mining restored both historic items in 1994.

But let’s turn now to Christoe’s role supervising the copper smelting works in the dunes of ‘Smelter’s Beac’, better known today as Burwood Beach, or Murdering Gully, in 1872.

Noted Hunter mining historian John Shoebridge knows better than most that there’s nothing left of the famous 19th century smelter on site today, except for some copper slag. Back in 2013, he conducted a tour of the site revealing Dr James Mitchell set up a smelter here in 1851-52. The site then reopened on a grand scale in 1868-69, but closed in 1873, probably producing about only 300 tons in its whole lifetime.

It was indeed a grand venture with eight buildings sprawled across the landscape behind Burwood Beach. Today, however, all have vanished.

Instead, in its place nearby amid the trees, is the Burwood Beach Wastewater (sewage) Treatment works. A lot of copper slag, however, may have helped build the only road today down to the isolated site, Shoebridge said.

Speaking of Newcastle street names, another relevant and topical name that comes to mind is humble Telford Street, in Newcastle’s historic East End.

It commemorates forgotten British engineer Thomas Telford (originally Telfer) known for improving road construction and bridge building.Well, that’s a massive understatement. Telford’s nickname was the Colossus of Roads.

This engineering genius (1757-1834) overcame early poverty to invent the modern road. A stonemason turned architect turned engineer also built 35 churches, plus harbours and canal docks. He also built the famous Menai Bridge, at Bangor, in North Wales. It was the first great suspension bridge of the modern age, back in 1826.

Astonishingly, almost everything he ever built remains in use today. In his 77 years he worked on 184 big projects, among them 93 large bridges and aqueducts, plus 17 canals and 37 docks/ harbours.He constructed more than 1200 miles (2040 km) of roads and 1076 bridges to open up the Highlands of Scotland, improved the navigation of four major English rivers and surveyed the route of three early British railways. Who’d have guessed it?

Finally, a fascinating, fitting tribute to this virtually forgotten revolutionary genius by author Julian Glover entitled Man of Iron (Bloomsbury $35) will be published in March.

[email protected]南京夜网 What’s in a name: A Christo Rd street sign reveals no hint of why it was so named.

Wildlife Aid blames Singleton bat deaths on lack of tree cover in Burdekin Park

BAKED: Flying foxes lay dead on the ground in Singleton’s Burdekin Park after last week’s heatwave. Wildlife volunteers say the removal of trees in the park contributed to the heat stress. Picture: Wildlife Aid IncANIMAL welfare organisation Wildlife Aid has blamed the deaths of up to 1000 flying foxes in Singleton in last week’s heatwaveon the felling of treesin the town’s main park.
南京夜网

Volunteers are still removing dead bats from Burdekin Park, in the Singleton CBD, where they “cooked from the inside, out” as temperatures soared to 46 degrees on Saturday.

Many of the bats were found still gripping the trees as their lifeless bodies hang below.

“We’ve seen bats die after a heatwave before, but nothing like these figures,” Wildlife Aid bat coordinator Jaala Presland said.

“It wouldn’t be unreasonable to estimate 1000 bats have died, and they’re still dying –that’s a very big chunk considering the size of the camp before the heat.”

The influx of bats over more than a decade had all but destroyed most of the trees in thepark, which was eventually shut to the public due to the danger of falling branches as well as other health and safety concerns before a councilclean-up campaign.

Before Friday, Wildlife Aid estimated the size of the camp in Burdekin Park to be about 2000, which is down significantly on estimates of up to 30,000 bats that called the park home before dozens of badly damaged trees were removedlast year.

Bats lay dead in Singleton’s Burdekin Park after the heatwave. Video: Wildlife Aid IncFormer mayor John Martin said the strategy was successful, as there was nowhere for the bats to roost, granting reprieve to residents who had been “tormented” by the colony for years.

However, Ms Presland said the removal of trees took away shade and a source of nutrition in the park, producing a nasty side effect on the endangered species.

“You can’t imagine what they would have went through,” she said.

“In the past, theywould have climbed up into the canopies of the trees to cool down in the shade. Taking away their habitat may have moved some of them on, but most of the bats still in the park had nowhere to go and cooked from the inside, out.”

No trees turned flying foxes into frying foxes: rescuers Bats at East Cessnock on November 8, 2016. Picture: Marina Neil

Bats at East Cessnock on November 8, 2016. Picture: Marina Neil

Bats at East Cessnock on November 8, 2016. Picture: Marina Neil

Bats at East Cessnock on November 8, 2016. Picture: Marina Neil

Bats at East Cessnock on November 8, 2016. Picture: Marina Neil

THE BATS ARE BACK: Hundreds of flying foxes have returned to the corner of Long Street and Old Maitland Road, East Cessnock in November 2016. Picture: Krystal Sellars

THE BATS ARE BACK: Hundreds of flying foxes have returned to the corner of Long Street and Old Maitland Road, East Cessnock in November 2016. Picture: Krystal Sellars

THE BATS ARE BACK: Hundreds of flying foxes have returned to the corner of Long Street and Old Maitland Road, East Cessnock in November 2016. Picture: Krystal Sellars

THE BATS ARE BACK: Hundreds of flying foxes have returned to the corner of Long Street and Old Maitland Road, East Cessnock in November 2016. Picture: Krystal Sellars

THE BATS ARE BACK: Hundreds of flying foxes have returned to the corner of Long Street and Old Maitland Road, East Cessnock in November 2016. Picture: Krystal Sellars

THE BATS ARE BACK: Hundreds of flying foxes have returned to the corner of Long Street and Old Maitland Road, East Cessnock in November 2016. Picture: Krystal Sellars

THE BATS ARE BACK: Hundreds of flying foxes have returned to the corner of Long Street and Old Maitland Road, East Cessnock in November 2016. Picture: Krystal Sellars

THE BATS ARE BACK: Hundreds of flying foxes have returned to the corner of Long Street and Old Maitland Road, East Cessnock in November 2016. Picture: Krystal Sellars

Bats in central Maitland, November 3, 2016. Picture: Jonathan Carroll

Bats in central Maitland, November 3, 2016. Picture: Jonathan Carroll

Bats in central Maitland, November 3, 2016. Picture: Jonathan Carroll

Bats in central Maitland, November 3, 2016. Picture: Jonathan Carroll

Bats in central Maitland, November 3, 2016. Picture: Jonathan Carroll

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016. Picture: Rachelle Corcoran

Bats at Carrington in early 2016. Picture: Susan Mitchell

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016. Picture: ShayLeigh Riddle

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Bats on the barricades at Burdekin Park in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Flying foxes in the Hunter region in early 2016.

Member for Hunter Joel Fitzgibbon inspects the bats with East Cessnock residents Cindy Jeffery and Pamela Jeffery in April 2016.

East Cessnock bats in early 2016.

Behind Cessnock East Public School, early 2016 Picture: Emmie Price

Bats in the Hunter region in early 2016. Picture: Kimberly Johnson

Dead bats near East Cessnock School in early 2016. . Picture: Michelle Bond

Bats in the Hunter region in early 2016. Picture: Crystal Maree Norden

Bats in the Hunter region in early 2016. Picture: Daniel Radford

Bats in the Hunter region in early 2016. Picture: Kylie Radford

Bats in the Hunter region in early 2016. Picture: Kylie Radford

Bats in the Hunter region in early 2016. Picture: Kylie Radford

Cessnock Bat Camp in early 2016. Picture: April Hatchamana

Taken Cessnock Bat Camp. Picture: April Hatchamana

Cessnock Bat Camp in early 2016. Picture: April Hatchamana

Cessnock bat camp, early 2016. Picture: April Hatchamana

Bats in the Hunter, early 2016. Picture: Candice Preece

Bats in the Hunter, early 2016. Picture: Tiarna Croft

Bats in the Hunter, early 2016. Picture: Walter Upson

Bats in the Hunter, early 2016. Picture: Walter Upson

Bats in the Hunter, early 2016. Picture: Walter Upson

Bats in the Hunter, early 2016. Picture: Dyarnie Riddock

Bats in the Hunter, early 2016. Picture: Neil Lyle

Bats in the Hunter, early 2016. INSTA @ynot_young_nomads_on_tour_ #battyhunter #battyhunters

Bats in the Hunter, early 2016. Fried bat in Blackwood Avenue. Picture: Nathan Wright

Bats in the Hunter, early 2016. Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

Bats and damage in Burdekin Park, Singleton in early 2016. Pictures: Shannon Dann

TweetFacebook The Hunter’s bat plague: photosA collection of photos of flying fox camps across the Hunter. Pictures: Various photographersCr Martin defended his council’s decision to remove the trees.

“It was done legally and legitimately,” he said. “The park was broken down and ruined, the situation was unbearable. My opinion was then, and still is now, we had to do something about it.”

There had not been any reports of deaths at other troublesome bat colonies in Cessnock and Maitland.

Elsewhere in the state, thousands of bats died in Casino in northern NSW.

Ms Presland said while it was common for a percentage of bats to die in hot weather, the weekend’s death toll was the worst since the first “heat stress event” in 2004, when 2500 bats died.

Theweekend roasting killed a higher number of bats as a proportion of the total colony, and came after another 100 died in January.

Residents are being warnednot to touch thebat carcasses, which can carry the deadly lyssavirus, instead urging they be reported.

Newcastle Supercars race will make foreshore a ‘construction zone’ for eight months

Foreshore to become a ‘construction zone’ STILL ON: John Bisegna with, Lachlan Smith 9, Sarah Bisegna 7, and Samuel Bisegna 10, were relieved the Flatrock surf competition will go ahead. PICTURE: Marina Neil
南京夜网

TweetFacebookNewcastle City Council did not respond to questions about the letter before deadline on Wednesday, but shortly after the Newcastle Heraldinquiredabout the decisionfestival organisers were contacted to say they could hold the competition.

The Herald understands the council made the decision to allow the event to go ahead because the surf festival was so close to the works period.

John Bisegna, from the East End Boardriders group, said he was “relieved” by the change of heart.

“The council initially said they’d work with us to find a new location, but you can’t have the Flatrock surf festival somewhere else, because it’s a different surf break, it becomes the Merewether surf festival or wherever,” he said.

Despite the decision, the letter raises questions about other events slated to be held inNewcastle for eight months during2017.

A number of other events includingtheDestination NSW sponsored Newcastle Supermoto race –are held in the same precinct.

It will also reignite debate about access to the Newcastle foreshore in the lead up to the race. The council has previously said beaches will be accessible “as usual”, and that no decisions had been made about road closures.

On Tuesdaytourism minister Adam Marshall said in a speech in parliament that “any suggestion that the public will be prevented from using Newcastle’s finest beaches and public areas is not correct and couldn’t be further from the truth”.

It comes after the Heraldreported Supercars Australia would develop a heritage plan beforethe event.

The race –which enjoys the support of both the state government and Newcastle council –has become increasingly controversial among some East End residentssince it was announced last year.

On Tuesday the government introduced a bill into parliament that will see the race officially moved from its former home in Homebush to Newcastle.

McGregor v Mayweather: why it will be Farce of the Century II

Roll up! Roll up! Roll up!
南京夜网

Floyd Mayweather v Conor McGregor!

The Ultimate Fight in Las Vegas!

Mayweather, the undefeated boxing champion to beat ’em all, v the Irish UFC fighter McGregor who has beaten them all up in his own sport – and now needs someone bigger to work over!

Not just a battle between fighters, but between sports! Not just the 39-year-old Old Bull v the 28-year-old Young Bull, but Ye Olde Pugilistic Art v Street Thuggery pretending to a respectability it does not remotely possess.

Friends, it is tabloid heaven, and it broke in the Irish Sun on Monday, instantly generating headlines around the world.

“Conor McGregor and Floyd Mayweather,” the paper quoted a source close to the Irishman, “have agreed a deal to fight and have both settled on their respective fees. The contract hasn’t officially been signed yet because of a third party hold-up but all the details have all been agreed on. The fight could even be announced within two weeks.”

And yes, of course, Mayweather, has since downplayed the report with some quotes of his own, but, happily, I speak fluent boxer and can translate:

“There seems,” Mayweather said, “to be several rumours floating around media recently however, let the record show, there hasn’t been any deals made in regards to a fight between myself and any other fighters.” (Translation: Like the Irish Sun says, I have not yet actually put pen to paper to sign the contract. What I’d actually like, first, is to squeeze a few more million dollars out of the promoters. They’re currently talking $100 million for each of us, but I want more. My name is bigger than his.)

“I am happily retired and enjoying life at this time. (Look, I think even my supporters are laughing hard at that one. In the history of the world no one with my record just says ‘I’ve had enough’ and walks away. We will always come back for more, and I will, too. I just want to squeeze a few more million out of them, did I mention?)

“If any changes are to come, be sure that I will be the first to let the world know.” (“Come on, gimme a few more million! You can see the publicity even this report is generating, you must KNOW that this thing will turn over a billion dollars!”)

For his part, McGregor has already waxed lyrical on his chances. “I’ve got the reach. I’ve got youth. I’ve got the confidence. I’ve got the unpredictable style. You can’t prepare for a style like me. Why conquer one world when you can conquer two? So I’m going to go conquer two worlds.” (Translation: “$100 million? That’ll do me!”)

In sum, my pound to your peanut says it will happen. And my pound to your peanut farm says it will be a farce.

Older readers will remember that in 1976, the great Muhammad Ali took on the world’s wrestling champion, Antonio Inoki, in Tokyo, in what was billed as the “Fight of the Century”, before a global audience of 1.4 billion.

It was actually the Farce of the Century. What we saw, instead of a genuine contest, was Muhammad standing over the poor bastard who refused to stand and kept kicking him in the leg.

“The celebrated ‘Bout of the Century’ turned out to be the rip-off of the century,” the Japan Times noted the next day. “The 15-round contest was pretty much a bore from start to finish. Ending in a draw, it proved once again that when an apple fights an orange, the results can only be a fruit salad.”

Ditto this.

For, what rules could they come up with to make it an actual contest?

On one side you have boxing, based on Marquis of Queensbury rules, which, from 1865, maintains that, “you must not fight simply to win; no holds barred is not the way; you must win by the rules.” Those rules are very explicit and based on the notion that boxing is an art, that rules are followed by gentlemen and that thugs need not apply to win in their thuggish ways.

And on the other side you have UFC – much more lethal and multifaceted than mere kickboxing – which says, broadly, that “the only rule is are that there are no rules, and anything goes!”

In pure fighting terms, it is putting a boxer with a hammer, up against a UFC fighter with a hammer, a chainsaw, a grappling hook, a knife and the sledgehammer that is his foot flying at his opponent’s head.

How do you make that an even contest?

You don’t. You just make it appear an even contest in some contrived manner, you sell the rights, sell the tickets and make hundreds of millions of dollars as the suckers pour in.

“No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public,” the great H.L. Mencken once wrote, and this, friends, will prove to be the second-greatest example of that, after the ascension of President Donald Trump. But it runs it close … which is saying something.

Twitter: @Peter_Fitz

VIDEO: Alex Lahey is cracking the whip for her debut album

ON A ROLL: Alex Lahey is expanding her horizons in the UK supporting her childhood idols Tegan and Sara.ANYONE who has learnt to play guitar remembers the joy of finally making the strings produce the sound of a recognisable song. Like solving amagical puzzle.
南京夜网

The first songs indie songwriter Alex Lahey taught herself wereTegan andSara’s Nineteen and Call It Off from the Canadian duo’s 2007 album The Con.

It’s fitting that the same act which played a pivotal rolein Lahey’s earlymusical development, are also helpingthe 24-year-old Melbournian take hernext major step in the industry.

Lahey is in Englandon her first international tour supporting Tegan and Sara.

“It’s definitely the biggest opportunity given to me so far and I am so grateful to Tegan and Sara for it,” Lahey tells Weekender from her London motel room.“This is the first time I’ve ever toured overseas and to be doing it under the wing of two of the most respected artists in the world is truly humbling.”

It was actually Lahey’s deep respect for Tegan and Sara’s music thathelpedher land the support tour, which passes through venues like London’s Roundhouse and Manchester’s Albert Hall.

“When I was at SplendourI just went up to them and said, ‘thank you for giving me the songs that helped me develop into my own artist’,” she says.“To even have the opportunity to express my gratitude to them like that was such an honour.”

Alex Lahey – Wes AndersonThe hype surrounding Lahey has been building over the past year. Her debut EP B-Grade University and its singles Let’s Go Out and You Don’t Think You Like People Like Me are Triple J favourites andLahey’s melodic tunes and wittyobservational lyrics have led to comparisons with Courtney Barnett.

Expectations are high Lahey will deliver with herdebut album. The record is currently in production and is being produced by Holy Holy guitarist Oscar Dawson.

“The record is coming along swimmingly, thus far,” Lahey says.“We tracked the beds for seven of the songs on it last week before I flew to the UK, and will we keep working on those and some other songs I’ve written for the next couple of months until it’s all done and dusted. Making a first album is a very daunting, yet exciting task, and having someone like Oscar working on my first record with me makes it all the more special for me.”

Just like B-Grade University, Lahey’s album will cover a widerange oftopics. Everything from getting dumped toaccepting her brother’s friendship and telling off people for texting while driving.

Alex LaheyB-Grade Uni EP with any sort of plan for how it would turn out and I’m taking that attitude into this album too, in a way,” she says.“I think the record will show some development and potentially more cohesion in the arrangements of the songs, but at the end of the day, I only ever write about things that I’ve experienced personally, so that common thread will still be there.”

Following the overseas tour, Lahey is heading back to the Hunter for the Hard Grime festival at Maitland Gaol. On her last trip to Newcastle she played a wild free show at the Sydney Junction Hotel.

“The show was awesome, not only because of the energy in the room, but also because of the genuine gratitude from everyone who came along,” she says.“It just goes to show that touring isn’t just about hitting up capital cities.”

Catch Alex Lahey alongside The Gooch Palms, Luca Brasi and Nicole Millarat Hard Grime on March 4.

Lane Cove, North Sydney councils reconsider fight against mergers as five stand firm

NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian announcing on Tuesday that the government would proceed with the five merger proposal across Sydney. Photo: Louise KennerleyNSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian may have resolved the uncertainty in regional councils, but in Sydney the limbo continues as mayors expressed disappointment and frustration over the government’s decision to continue the city mergers.
南京夜网

Promising to “end the uncertainty”, Ms Berejiklian announced on Tuesday the government would abandon its proposed mergers of regional councils, which had been delayed by legal action.

But she recommitted to proceeding with the five pending Sydney mergers, which councils have also fought through the courts.

“Profound disappointment sums it up,” said Hunters Hill mayor Richard Quinn, who accused the government of prioritising a development agenda over local representation.

“Ms Berejiklian hasn’t ended uncertainty at all. What certainty has come is that the whole motive is housing and development issues. It’s about ensuring there is more and more development in Sydney.”

Justifying her decision on Tuesday, Ms Berejiklian said the benefits of the city mergers far outweighed those in the bush, and were necessary to address the city’s housing affordability crisis and improve development approval times.

“It is really important for us if we care about housing affordability, if we care about planning and infrastructure, to go and proceed with these reforms.”

While some mayors have reaffirmed their council’s resolve to continue their legal challenges, others are reassessing the futility of the fight, given the government’s renewed determination, amid mounting costs to ratepayers.

Mayors from Hunters Hill, Strathfield, Ku-ring-gai, Mosman and Woollahra all confirmed their councils would not abandon their legal challenges.

However, Lane Cove and North Sydney councils will vote to decide whether to maintain their appeals at council meetings on Monday.

In North Sydney, where residents will soon go to the polls for the North Shore byelection, mayor Jilly Gibson said she was now “very despondent” about the council’s legal challenge, but acknowledged some of her fellow councillors did not share her view.

“The courts can’t save North Sydney council. Only the Premier, Gladys Berejiklian, can. There was one opportunity for our council to be saved and that was when Mike Baird stepped down and Gladys Berejiklian stood up.

“We’ll really have to seek some advice and make a very carefully considered decision about whether or not we proceed.”

However, deputy mayor Melissa Clare rejected Cr Gibson’s position as a “minority view” and said she was confident a motion to continue the legal fight would easily win the support of the other councillors at Monday’s meeting.

Lane Cove mayor Deborah Hutchens was also circumspect about the council’s ongoing attempt to fight the merger with Ryde and Hunters Hill councils.

“I’ve got very mixed feelings today, following what happened yesterday,” she said. “Is it worth pushing through. Is it worth fighting?”

However, in Mosman Council, opposition to the proposed merger with North Sydney and Willoughby councils remains unequivocal, Mayor Peter Abelson said.

“In Mosman Council, every single council resolution on whether to take legal action has been unanimous. There is complete solidarity we should be taking these steps.”

The legal challenges will also add to the uncertainty over when council elections can be held.

On Tuesday, Ms Berejiklian said she wanted all pending councils to hold elections by March 2018.

But the appeals for Mosman, North Sydney and Lane Cove are set down for April, with a judgment expected to delay any decision by weeks or even months, leaving a small window to achieve Ms Berejiklian’s timeline.

“The whole thing gets very messy. To claim uncertainty is finished is a big claim,” Cr Abelson said.

Aggrieved mayors also took aim at the Premier’s concession that a “one-size-fits-all approach for NSW” was the wrong approach, and one which had failed to appreciate the differences between the city and country.

Ku-ring-gai mayor Jennifer Anderson said a similar blanket rule had been applied to the city councils.

“Clearly, a one-size-fits-all model across Sydney is equally problematic in our case,” Cr Anderson said, noting that the council had no intention of abandoning its Supreme Court Appeal which begins on Thursday.

She said the proposed merger with Hornsby would force together “quite different communities of interest”, with Hornsby Shire “largely rural and river land” whereas Ku-ring-gai is an urban area with strong links to the city.

Tanna’s director knows a backlash against Donald Trump could rule out Oscar win

Island bliss: Bentley Dean films Tanna on a Vanuatu volcano. Photo: PHILIPPE PENEL Tribal unity: Martin Butler and Bentley Dean with members of the Yakal tribe (from left) Peter Kowia, Lingai Kowia and Caha Toata.
南京夜网

Beginnings: Bentley Dean (bottom left) when he started making films with The Race Around The World team in 1997. Photo: Peter Rae

Less than two weeks before the Academy Awards, Australian filmmaker Bentley Dean is wandering around the city looking for a pair of black shoes.

One of the two directors of Tanna, the country’s first nomination for best foreign-language film, already has a good suit from the world premiere at the Venice Film Festival but shoes are proving tricky. “I need help,” he says. “Got any recommendations?”

Dean, who made the touching Vanuatu island romance with Martin Butler, reckons he’s solved another Oscars fashion dilemma. “Instead of a bow tie, I’m thinking of wearing pig’s tusks,” he says.

The filmmakers, who leave for Los Angeles on Saturday, had to miss last week’s Oscar nominees lunch for financial reasons. “It was a little bit too extravagant for us to go there,” Dean says.

But they have big plans for the awards. Just as at the Australian premiere at the Adelaide Film Festival, they will be joined by members of Vanuatu’s Yakel community wearing their tribal dress – feathered head-dresses with grass skirts for women and penis sheaths for men.

“They’re of course keen to wear their traditional dress on the red carpet and the people at the academy have said ‘yes, by all means’,” Dean says. Living in a village without electricity let alone a cinema or television, they won’t know most of the famous faces around them. Dean thinks there’s a chance they might fall asleep if they ceremony gets dull.

There is just one Hollywood star who might ring a bell. The villagers know that Mungau Dain, who stars in Tanna, was once described on the island as “Vanuatu’s Prat Pitt”.

While Tanna had only a small Australian cinema season and has been out on DVD and digital release for a year, the Oscar nomination has triggered new interest in a film shot for just $1 million, including a limited re-release.

“It’s amazing what the Oscar trademark does to a film,” Dean says. “All of a sudden our sales agent says there’s been interest from all over the world. He reckons he’ll sell it to almost every territory, including the ones that have been dithering.”

Considering how Tanna was made, it is remarkable that it has become one of a record 14 Australian nominations at the Oscars on February 27.

Dean and Butler collaborated with the roughly 200 members of one of the South Pacific’s last traditional tribes, who live by the same beliefs and customs they have followed for centuries. They don’t have electricity for their huts, which meant the filmmakers had to import a solar panel to charge their batteries, and they still hunt with bows and arrows.

Because the tribe had never seen a feature film before, Dean and Butler showed them the Aboriginal drama Ten Canoes so they could get a sense of how to bring one of their own stories to the screen. They decided to dramatise a controversial real-life romance that took place in the 1980s, with the cast speaking the tribal language Nauvhal.

During filming, the filmmakers hosted movie nights for the villagers that included their own documentaries and Star Wars. “The most popular was the series of David Attenborough’s Life On Earth,” Dean says. “They just loved it, seeing all of these incredible animals that they’d never seen before.”

If getting to the Oscars was way beyond expectations, the two directors are well aware that a Hollywood backlash against President Donald Trump’s controversial travel ban affecting seven predominantly Muslim nations could mean Tanna has no chance of winning.

“Hollywood does like a cause,” Dean says. “Politics may enter into the decision-making and that’s not such a bad thing. The odds of us winning are very, very low.”

With Oscars voting underway, there has been speculation that academy members could protest about Trump’s immigration policies by voting for two other nominees – Asghar Farhadi’s The Salesman, given the Iranian director is boycotting the Oscars in protest at the ban, or Hannes Holm’s A Man Called Ove, a Swedish film about a cranky old bigot who is upset when an Iranian woman moves next door.

But Dean, who considers Germany’s critically acclaimed Toni Erdmann another leading contender, believes there are good reasons that members should vote for Tanna.

“I think it exemplifies what the category of foreign-language film is all about, which is essentially to celebrate film in all its forms, wherever it comes from – not just English language,” he says. “In Tanna, you’ve got people who started out in this process not even having seen cinema before – let alone participated or acted in it – and here they are being considered one of the five best foreign-language films of the year and they’re in Hollywood.

“It sums up what’s magic and what’s transformative and what’s brilliant about cinema, in particular world cinema. I haven’t seen the other films but I can’t think of a better example than Tanna that captures the spirit of this category.”

While three Yakel villagers are going to the Oscars – cultural director J.J. Nako and cast members Lingai Kowia and his daughter Selin – Dean says it has sadly proven too difficult for Butler to be joined by his journalist wife Liz Jackson, who revealed her struggle with a form of Parkinson’s disease on Four Corners late last year.

“We knew that we’d have an excellent time and we’d learn a lot [making Tanna] but it’s gone beyond our wildest dreams to end up with a good film and for it to be appreciated with the highest accolades you can get,” Dean says. “To be nominated for an Academy Award is pretty damn good.”Perkins to appear at Jasper Jones sessions

Director Rachel Perkins, author Craig Silvey and a revolving cast of actors are appearing at a batch of Q&A sessions around the country to launch Jasper Jones in coming weeks.

In Sydney, they are at no less than four cinemas next Monday – the Chauvel (with Dan Wyllie), Cremorne Orpheum (with Wyllie and Hugo Weaving), Dendy Newtown (with Weaving, Angourie Rice and Aaron McGrath) and Event Cinemas George Street (with an introduction rather than a Q&A with Weaving, Rice and McGrath).

Opening soon: Aaron McGrath and Levi Miller in Jasper Jones

In Melbourne, there are two sessions next Wednesday – Cinema Nova and Sun Theatre, Yarraville (both with Hugo Weaving and Dan Wyllie). And two sessions the next night – Palace Como and Rivoli Cinemas (both with Wyllie and Angourie Rice).

Perkins has adapted Silvey’s popular novel for the drama, which centres on a bookish 14-year-old (played by Levi Miller from Red Dog: True Blue) and a mixed-race outcast (McGrath) whose lives in a West Australian town are changed by a mystery. It opens on March 2.The Dressmaker and Down Under filmmakers develop follow-ups

New films from the directors of The Dressmaker, Down Under and Jasper Jones are among a slate of new films to get development funding from Screen Australia.

The Dressmaker’s Jocelyn Moorhouse is working on The Variations, a drama about “one of the most potent love triangles in music history” centring on legendary 19th century musicians Clara Schumann, her husband Robert and Johannes Brahms.

Working on a love triangle centring on famous classical musicians: Jocelyn Moorhouse.

Down Under’s Abe Forsythe is developing Little Monsters, a comic horror film “dedicated to all the kindergarten teachers out there who motivate our children to learn, instil them with confidence and stop them from being devoured by zombies”.

And Jasper Jones’ Rachel Perkins is working again with writer Craig Silvey on The Prospector, a western crime mystery about a woman who risks everything to find her missing husband during the West Australian gold rush. Also funded is an adaptation of Leah Purcell’s acclaimed play The Drover’s Wife, which re-imagines Henry Lawson’s classic short story.

Twitter @gmaddox